I am thinking tonight about three ladies. Three true best friends. Growing up church was the center of my life. My best friends were my friends from church. There was Jill O'Dell and her brothers Jack and Keith. There was Bobby Smith. And any number of other good friends who attended the Young Peoples Legion at The Salvation Army in Havre de Grace, Md. This was our church and our church family. We were all close. At times we were best of friends. At other times we had falling outs and arguments. It was all typical kids stuff. We were raised in a very strict church. And we tested the bounds of that strictness at every opportunity. I still talk with Jill on Facebook. And I still love her like a sister. I know her brother has been ill recently and we have talked about it on occasion and I have promised to pray for him from time to time. I still talk with Bobby Smith on occasion also. Although I have to admit I talk more with his nieces and nephews now than I do with Bob. But I still feel that family dynamic with them from the years past. These friendships were so important back then and I am so happy to be connected with these people today through Facebook.
I mentioned three ladies just above. These ladies would be Penny Williams, Judy Keithley Hopps, and Bonnie Hurlbut. The four of us had a unique, special and bizarre bond at times. As a unit we were four very close friends. On individuals we had unique relationships with each other. I can't speak for any of them. We all had our separate and individual bonds. But I can speak of my personal bond to them. We shared dreams. We shared plans. And we thought we would always be together in one way or another. We went through good times and sad times together. We were there when we lost grandparents and parents. We were there when life threw it's curves at us in our young lives. But turning sixty six next week I find it only seems like yesterday that we were getting into trouble and laughing and crying together.
Judy, Penny, Bonnie and I sang together in a contemporary religious music group in our church. My sister Shelley was in the group. So was my cousin Frank. Frank played the drums. Shelley's best friend Diane played the piano. Judy, Penny, Bonnie and I were the older members of the group. I don't remember how well we sang but I remember all of the rehearsals and all of those old songs we sang. It was the best of times.
I had a terrible car accident when I was 19. I totaled a 1970 Volkswagen Karmann Ghia. It was identical to the photo above. Judy and Penny were in the car with me. Penny was knocked unconscious. Judy ended up with stitches down the front of her face. I lost some teeth and had stitches above my eye and my upper lip. We traveled by ambulance to a hospital Judy rode in the back with Penny who was unconscious. I rode in the front with the ambulance driver. I still can see Judy drawing a peace sign in the fog on the window between the back and the back front window where I was sitting. We all cried that day and were afraid. At one time we thought we had lost Penny. But fortunately it was not that serious. But we were terrified. Luckily for her, Bonnie was not with us that day.
We all talked about renting a big house and moving in together in some sort of commune. We had lots of ideas and lots of dreams. This never happened. But it was a plan. We even had the house picked out that we wanted to rent. We had lots of ideas that never came to fruition and probably for the best but maybe not?
Bonnie is another story. I loved her dearly. We went to high school together. We shared our hall way lockers together. We had a unique bond. When I got home from school each day I would call her and we would watch Dark Shadows together over the phone. I can't explain our friendship. It was just special. My father had drinking problems at times and I would go to Bonnie's house to spend the night to avoid dealing with his drinking. The first time I stayed there it was odd. Her mother was asleep already. But Bonnie told me I could use the couch at their house. When her mother woke up the next morning she found me down there on her couch. All she said was "Larry what are you doing on my couch?" She wasn't angry and never questioned me about being there. She was just surprised. She told me I could stay there anytime I needed to. Her mother used to bake cakes for my family and send them to our house over the Christmas holidays. When I got married and my first daughter was born Bonnie was right there. She loved Katie almost like it was her own child. She always said Katie was her little Shirley Temple because of her curly hair. One time I bought one of those huge wall units that had shelves and a space for your TV. I don't know why I bought it for because I could not put anything together and this unit came in a big box with lots of screws, bolts and pieces. I called Bonnie at 11:00 that night frustrated with not being able to get the thing together. She immediately came over to my house, brought her tools, and we spent the entire night until the early morning hours putting that unit together. We laughed at times. We cried at times. And like all friendships we too eventually grew apart as our life paths moved on.
Bonnie was not in the car accident that Judy, Penny and I survived. But she did die in a car accident just before she turned fifty. When I got the news I was distraught. I miss her to this day.
The four of us were close. We all moved on in our individual lives. Judy is in Texas. Penny is in Colorado. I am still in Baltimore. But our memories are still with us. We all knew each others families. And we learned from each other parents and grandparents.
Penny and I were nursery class students together at Sunday School and Vacation Bible School. Her mother was the Young Peoples Sargent Major at The Salvation Army. She was my greatest spiritual teacher. Most of what I learned about faith and religion came from her mother. My grandmother was our Bible School teacher and our Sunday School teacher. I can still remember as a pre schooler sitting at a table that only had three legs in Vacation Bible School. Dear old Miss Maggie McMullen held the end of the table up with her trembling skinny little legs as my grandmother taught us the lesson. And when we went to color our Bible Story pictures our crayons would roll off the table when Miss Maggie's leg would slip.
Judy's mother Margarette and her grandmother "Nanny" taught me life lessons that I will carry with me to my last days. They were two ladies living alone bringing up a family. They worked hard, they struggled and they survived with dignity. I still wish I could go back to their old home and have Nanny tell me "Sit down. Here's a comic book." Then I would wait for Judy to come downstairs so we could go out for the day. If it wasn't a comic book it would be a cat she would hand me. She loved her cats.
I miss those days. I miss my friends. But they are all still in my heart. So on this birthday week I call out Judy, Penny, and Bonnie. I know you all can still feel that bond and that love where ever we all are today.
